How to stop having disappointing moments in life

How many time have you been let down by your expectations?

Seriously, “expecting” anything from anyone is the root cause of disappointment in your life. You start leveling up your hopes in dream of “getting X” but in reality you don’t. Its sad but that’s how life works, its yin-yang remember?

Consider your average common scenario that can occur in everyone’s life:

• Didn’t get the reply from crush?
• Didn’t get that job?
• Didn’t get that promotion?
• Didn’t get that scholarship?

… the list goes on.

Consider a real-life absurd example which recently happened with me, I am a big MCU (Marvel Cenamatic Universe) buff, so I go to every Marvel movie that comes up next.

• A lot of folks are excited about the release of Spiderman No Way Home, me on another hand has no expectations from this movie (probably not a big fan). I went to go this movie, and there you go in the first 20 minutes or so Daredevil pops up (I love this character, I would recommend watching the Daredevil TV series on Hotstar to understand why this was a big moment in the movie), nobody knew about this and honestly this moment made the movie 10x for me. No disappointment whatsoever.
• Now consider the release of Doctor Strange in Multiverse of Madness, my hopes for this were high because we knew so much could happen in this movie but Marvel decided to go lightweight this time (I mean yes, it was a good storyline) but I was a little “disappointed” thinking a “lot of things” could happen.

I know this is circumstantial & personal, but I encourage you to have a look at moments from your life on how many times have your felt something similar.

Getting disappointed with something can lead you to demotivation and self-doubt. Now this doesn’t mean to not do anything when expectations are not met. Let’s say you ordered chicken biryani using a food delivery app and if on arrival you don’t see any chicken in biryani then definitely raise a complaint to the app instead of letting it go.

My point is to do things that are in your control. Don’t overload it, Don’t overthink it.

What to do then?

Now I am not a life-coach but I believe simple changes in your thinking capacity can eliminate disappointment from your life.

• Just give your best effort on things you can control. Whatever the results may be, positive or negative, accept them and move on. And ofc make a mental note on what things to improve on future.
• Another thing that I like to practice nowadays is whenever I start raising my hope levels, I try to ground my thoughts back to reality, Just realising you are thinking too much helps.

Try to adapt a similar practice in your life as well, Say avoid overthinking things like

• Oh God, If I had this much money I would buy …
• If I get my dream job, I would do this and this …

Appreciate every step forward, but modulate your expectations.

Here is a comic by theawkwardyeti, which demonstrates my sentiments

I hope this helps the reader to atleast ponder over eliminating disappointing thoughts, until next time 👋